October 13, 2004

Forget an Instalanche, I want an Instant Lunch!!

Well, my little Pet Jawa has been amongst the top 100 blogs for months now. I'm getting a lot more traffic than I ever dreamed of. A lot of that traffic is by repeat customers and I'm getting so many comments that a number of people have suggested opening a Jawa discussion forum.

So, why am I still so blue? All this and still no Instalanche!! Validation in the blogosphere, we all know, comes from one source alone.

Well, I'm through with you Glenn Reynolds. No more will I seek the much coveted Instalanche. Instead, I'm going after the much yummier Instant Lunch.

How do the two compare?

Instalanche-immediate spike in traffic, lasting up to 48 hours.
Instant Lunch-immediate spike in sodium level, MSG headache up to 12 hours.

Instalanche-expect at least two or three bloggers to get a kick out of your post and add you to the blogroll.
Insant Lunch-expect at least two or three co-workers to get a kick out of you eating the sh*t they swore they'd never touch again their first day out of college.

Instalanche-a sudden feeling of self-satisfaction knowing that somehow your post drew the attention of the right-blogosphere's top blogger.
Instant Lunch-a sudden feeling of stomach-satisfaction, with the caveat that the empty calories you just scarfed down will leave you lethargic for the rest of the day.

Instalanche-with the sudden spike in traffic you can now up your Blog Ad rate to just under covering your total monthly ISP and blog host bill.
Instant Lunch-with the money you saved by eating cheap MSG laden quasi-Asian food you can now afford to run to the video store and rent the latest Adam Sandler film--only to find that you remember neither the food nor the film in the morning.

*UPDATE: Flea tells me it's an 'Instalanche'. What the h*ll is a lanche anyway? Sounds French.....or Canadian....either way, it does have a very Thurston Howell III air about it. Anyway, I've corrected it.

*the truth is I really did eat ramen-in-a-cup for lunch today. Not kidding. Three words: dee-li-cious!!

Posted by: Rusty at 02:41 PM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
Post contains 360 words, total size 2 kb.

1 Hey Rusty, maybe you're getting all this traffic on your blog because of the recent spats since I've joined!...hehehe. Seems I'm under attack by every UK blogger on here for my support of Bush and Blair on Iraq and for my nuke em attitude. Unfortunately, anger(as usual) got the best of me, and everyone thought I really meant blow them all up....I meant the terrorists, not everyone...however, if some innocents get caught up in the crossfire, oh well... I better stop...there I go again! LOL. Take care, Laura

Posted by: Laura at October 13, 2004 02:47 PM (ptOpl)

2 Dr., Instalaunch is overrated (I didn't mean that, Glenn, if you are reading.) Seriously, I was given my first on last Friday during the debates. Yeah, my traffic spiked to 1000 for the day, but dropped back to the normal 150-200 a couple days later; hardly a helping hand (Again, Lord Reynolds, the devil made me do it. It is not as it seems). Top 100 without a 'launch? That is something to behold. Congrats Rusty! Screw Instapundit and his cat blogging and puppy blending (Blogfather, please don't misunderstand. I worship the bandwidth you UPDATED on.)! Who needs 'im anyway?! (I do, your Highness Glenn. Please send traffic to http://...)

Posted by: Editor at October 13, 2004 03:14 PM (adpJH)

3 I thought it was an Instalanche... maybe this is one of those Genghis Khan things.

Posted by: Ghost of a flea at October 13, 2004 03:19 PM (A/nX4)

4 Well since I doubt he reads a lefty Blog like mine, screw em. You have a great Blog, and you are Blog Uncle to one of the greatest Lefty Blogs ever. So who the hell cares about His Highness. David Scott Anderson

Posted by: David Anderson at October 13, 2004 03:24 PM (g23uN)

5 Rusty, I got mine a few weeks after I started blogging. Got 4000 hits in one day. Guess how many hits/day I get now. That's right, 40/day avg. Lame-o. Instalaunch doesn't do crap. Take the InstaLunch.

Posted by: SparseMatrix at October 13, 2004 03:34 PM (935pb)

6 Hey, I heard that Bill from INDC Journal's had like 50 Instalanches ... why don't you ask if you can have one of his?

Posted by: Bill (NOT INDC JOURNAL) at October 13, 2004 05:03 PM (ALCT2)

7 Lanche? "Instalanche" as in "avalanche" (. . .from the French: avalanche, from Romansch avalantze "descent," altered (by metathesis of -l- and -v-, probably influenced by O.Fr. avaler "to descend, go down") from Prov. lavanca "avalanche," perhaps from a pre-L. Alpine language (the suffix -anca suggests Ligurian) -- See The Online Etymology Dictionary). And I really like the Shrimp-flavored Instant Lunches, but you need to put in about three shakes of Tabasco and six of soy sauce to get just the right flavor.

Posted by: JohnL at October 13, 2004 05:27 PM (Hs4rn)

8 I have been told that getting an Instalanche entails 1) writing about something Glenn likes; 2) getting out front of the blogcrowd and being one of the first to write about it; and 3) emailing Glenn to notify him. For my blog, DOUBLE TOOTHPICKS, our first (and only) Instalanche involved all three. I think all things must be aligned juuuuust right to make it happen... Steve Bragg

Posted by: Steve Bragg at October 13, 2004 06:16 PM (X/W9E)

9 Yeah, it's 'lanche because Instalance is a pun on avalanche, only you get crushed with transient traffic rather than snow.

Posted by: Jay Solo at October 13, 2004 10:23 PM (wZQAO)

10 MMmmmm Maruchan! At least you didn't get that crappy, fake Top Ramen stuff. And chicken is the best. Biatch!

Posted by: Digger at October 14, 2004 12:37 AM (FYEx6)

11 Paypal related death threats?

Posted by: Simon at October 14, 2004 05:51 AM (FUPxT)

12 Thats what I was wondering.

Posted by: Jane at October 14, 2004 08:14 AM (PcgQk)

13 Hello folks nice blog youre running

Posted by: lolita at January 19, 2005 07:45 PM (yM4u5)

14 That woman deserves her revenge and we deserve to die

Posted by: magna rx at April 04, 2005 05:27 PM (hO8X+)

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