3PO!! 3PO!!!3PO: Yes Master Vinnie we ran into some...
Master Vinnie: 3PO! I'm in kind of a hurry, so would you shut up and listen to me! I need you to have R2 shut down all the blog smashers on the Mu.Nu level! I repeat, shut down all the blog smashers on the Mu.Nu level!
3PO: Sir?
Master Vinnie: Have R2 shut down all the blog smashers on the Mu.Nu level!
3PO: We're trying Master Vinnie! Hurry R2!
R2: Whistle-beep, chirp.
Master Vinnie( with louder and more desperate screaming): Shut down all the blog smashers on the mu.nu level!
3PO: No! No! R2! Shut them all down!!!!
R2: Affirmative beep.
(Rusty and The Princess screaming in background).
Howie(In very short wookie suit): "AAAARGHHH!"....then all screaming......
3PO: Listen to them! They're dying R2. Curse my metal body. I wasn't fast enough. It's all my fault. My poor master.
(Sound over the com becomes cheering)
Master Vinnie: You did it 3PO!!! You did it! (sound of all cheering)
Rusty : Let's hope the old man was able to knock out that tractor beam, otherwise this could be a real short trip. Hit it Chewy!
Posted by: Howie at
07:59 PM
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Bom Bom Bom Bah Ba Dom Bah Ba DomYes the evil Darth Odie er uh Darth Howie needs to be educated in the moral complexities of simple matters. Like why fighting those who seek to dominate us through fear and terror is just wrong. Check out this loving tolerant piece of reader love mail.
On 6/15/06, leavenow iraq leavenowiraq@yahoo.com wrote:
nigger
I would take the time to educate you on our way of life and our constitution but how? and to what end- augustus bushie II /MacClinton & Heil Hilary Lady MacClinton/ at the end of the day these british socialist shitbags of the left and right that follow the sons and daughters of satan instead of jesus and are british instead of american are not to blame for perverting the american experiment in liberty and freedom into the frankenstein monster of a police state and empire- you are people who don't even want to think just kill f*ck kill f*ck kill f*ck oh yeah and eat and watch tv.
Yes I do watch the news and Andy every night. Next he will attempt to instruct me on how I can waste mental energy by over thinking how to start my car in the morning. Note the racial tolerance of this liberalÂ’s speech. Also note his assumption that we are pro war because we just donÂ’t know any better. A theme IÂ’ve noticed a lot lately," The unwashed masses need sophisticated liberals to look out for them because they are stinky and stupid. So we should take pity and get those foul smelly fools to vote for us. Then we can help them". Thanks but no thanks. more...
Posted by: Howie at
08:45 AM
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Jawapalooza: Rocky Mountain Edition (Fort Collins)
Any one in the Fort Collins area who wants to meet Rusty Shackleford for a night of debauchery* later in the week drop me a line.
more...
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Damn it! If it wasn't for the wife and kids I would love to head up north with my best friend who lives up there and party to Zarkman meeting his 72 goats,I.E.D.s and the 12 man train that Iowahawk talked about that our buddy from Jordan is dealing with 24/7, 365 a year. If it wasn't for the wife and kids it would be a done deal but I guess it is a no go. Have a good time Rusty it is a shame they have plenty of great beer up there and I would love to taste it for you.
Posted by: bags75 at June 13, 2006 10:14 PM (P9851)
3
This is why the ROP is superior. You could always tell wife #1 you had to go visit wife #2.
Posted by: Rusty at June 14, 2006 07:53 AM (eSRBg)
Reader Love Mail Turkish Fatwa Edition
As Rusty noted earlier we here at the Jawa Report have a brand new Fatwa from Turkey. Now Rusty promised to update us on the details but has not gotten to it. So all I know now is a Jihadi website based in Turkey has been making us even more infamous. So far it has resulted in DDOS attacks on mu.nu as well as lots of cool spam attacks. We have survived this so far. So lets all do a collective phttttt.
Today we have some cool reader love mail. WeÂ’ve not been getting so many of these lately since we always post them. But a new Fatwa brings new suckers.
Now this first one left a valid email. They posted from India and are trying to hide on an old thread. Of course as always itÂ’s the joooooos!
joji cherian
kunnumpurathujoji@yahoo.co.uk
who said there is democracy in us. us stands and exist for israel. it has no national interests, israels' interest are us intersts. there is no christianity. no freedom. every thing that us is doing is unchristian.americans are being murdred for israel. the slaves they are, they can not even wisper against it. americans are a terrorised people, condmned to to perish for israel. ppeople like bin laden are sending wake up calls to the american Christians
The next fun love mail comes from Istanbul Turkey and was posted on Vinnie’s Caption contest thread. But this brave mujahadbeen despite his threat to, “make love to us” was too chicken to leave a valid email. Pussy.
F*ck Anti Muslims
i will f*ck you,zarqavi is my favourite man,and usame bin laden,Adam olun
http://www.ciddi.com
za@hotmail.com
Also we have five, count em, five new authors here so welcome aboard one and all.
Update :
Vinnie, Editor In Chief Pro Tempore: What do you mean "we." You're retired.
Yeah I know retired, retarded something.
Update II: More reader Love mail from the UK Below the break.
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1
At least their taking the time to learn English. Thats more than the illegal aliens are doing.
Posted by: Leatherneck at June 12, 2006 04:22 PM (D2g/j)
2
You know..at first I did'nt like that zac guy what with all the killing and beheading of innocent men woman and children..but now that he's fertilizer...I like him a lot! I hope the coroner did'nt drop any of his ham sandwich in zac before he sewed him back up.
Posted by: morning wood at June 12, 2006 04:33 PM (+aNmG)
Posted by: greyrooster at June 13, 2006 08:34 PM (ZVFO9)
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Of course Fatwa issued against Dr. Rusty Shackleford for "Heading for the Mountians".
Of course there is also that little matter of the stuff you mainly you/we/us already did that got the first two actual fatwas so can't undo that. I forecast as 60 percent likelyhood of even more fatwas.
Posted by: Howie at June 14, 2006 07:38 AM (/Xibe)
3
Is anyone going to introduce the new posters, or are they supposed to be unknown?
Posted by: davec at June 11, 2006 08:32 PM (CcXvt)
4
Scroll down, Dave, Catholicgauze and Chris both introduced themselves.
The All Seeing Eye, well, after what he just went through, probably doesn't need a formal intro.
1
Hey Rusty. We'll miss you too. It won't really be Jawa without your insightful observations. Hope you enjoy the summer.
Posted by: Richard at June 10, 2006 06:47 PM (7KF8r)
2
I leave for a week to go to the border to get that situation under control and all hell breaks loose here. Rusty is leaving, al-Zarqawi gets whacked(which is the best news I've heard in years), and the Jawa is finally getting the respect it deserves. Good thing I'm back.
Posted by: jesusland joe at June 10, 2006 07:23 PM (rUyw4)
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I guess I'll hafta muddle through the summer making fun of Vinnie's rate and Bluto's choice of residence.
Rusty, I can only hope your summer is filled with sightings of drunken starlets and "differently gendered" hookers.
Posted by: MCPO Airdale at June 10, 2006 07:25 PM (3nKvy)
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NOOOOOOO DOCTOR!!!
have phun wherever you are!
If you get captured by these terrorists remember to keep interrupting the speaker :-D
Thats what I would do, and when they tried to behead me, I would scream STOP TICKLING ME!! STOP IT!!!
Posted by: Billy Faeth at June 10, 2006 08:52 PM (frD3Z)
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It figures! I come back to the blog, and now Rusty's on the lam.
Anyway, have a great summa!!
Posted by: Laura at June 11, 2006 08:18 AM (WeRWZ)
The Force is Strong With this One
Congrats to Padawan Interested Participant on his 5,000th post. At last count, nearly 4,000 of those posts were about hot female high school teachers having sex with their students. We see he has already been turned to the Dark Side. You are hereby elevated to Sith Master.
Also, we hear that Mrs. Participant is recovering from surgery. We wish her a speedy recovery.
1
The level of hate is really quite surprising, perhaps they should be kicked out of the US to say, China, they can then try the same crap over there, lets see how long they last.
Oh and also that fool at the bottom holding a 'Fuck the Army' placard, send her off too, lets see if she'll be so quick to whip out the placard when the Chinese secret police come to get her.
Posted by: MathewK at June 07, 2006 05:41 PM (pVHqF)
Wanted: Sith Masters and Paduan LearnersWanted:Talented Writers who will work for next to nothing to report for The Jawa Report while Rusty languishes at his second home on the Riviera is busy on other matters this summer. Enquire within.
The Jawa Report is an EEOC employer. Hot women Anyone is especially encouraged to apply.
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I'd be interested in contributing. I currently write for NewsBusters (Eric Arr) and have my own blog at Mein Blogovault (click the screenname). Drop an email if you're interested, or I'll do the same !
Onward!
Posted by: Good Lt at June 07, 2006 07:44 AM (yT+NK)
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How would you like a foriegn (UK) correspondent? I promoise to keep my research (beer) expenses reasonably low.
WillS
Posted by: WillS at June 07, 2006 08:39 AM (o4YMh)
1
Great post Vinnie. I think the vast majority of westerners have no idea what's going on. Like you said, they are so easily taken in by the exotic. I'm still amazed by the MSM's unwillingness to call a spade a spade. I agree that islamists aren't lazy. And they're not stupid either. They've studied us and they know how to work the system. They probably can't believe how compliant the West is... how it bends over backward to demonstrate its tolerance for just about anything. Their attack is multi-pronged and insidious. I think in their eyes, the West must look extremely foolish.
Posted by: Richard at June 04, 2006 08:03 AM (7KF8r)
2
Predictably, here's where the Lefty fifth columnists pipe in about how "most" muslims are harmless and just want to live in peace!!! waaaahaaa!
Would that they would apply that same logic when they are attacking our military and our country.
You see, apparently the fact that "most" Americans are harmless and just want to live in peace doesn't stop America from being an imperialist racist warmongering empire. Or the fact that "most" men/women in the military are honorable warriors doesn't stop the military from being blood thirsty butchers intent on killing women and children. Nope. In that case "most" doesn't count.
Remember, only when dealing with islam and muslims does "most" count. And as we know, "most" muslims are just peaceful shopkeepers and working slobs.
Posted by: Jesusland Carlos at June 04, 2006 08:24 AM (8e/V4)
3
Thanks for linking. I've linked to you here: http://consul-at-arms.blogspot.com/2006/06/re-were-at-war.html
Posted by: Consul-At-Arms at June 04, 2006 01:01 PM (c1CbA)
5
I think things went astray when I moved your from one server to the other and then back again. There's probably two copies of your blog on the server, one with the extra posts, and one without.
I'll see if I can recover them for you.
Posted by: Pixy Misa at June 05, 2006 05:47 PM (FRalS)
1
Welcome back!
I always wonder when my favorite blogs fail to load!
Rusty feeling his fatwas?
Posted by: Melissa In Texas at June 03, 2006 08:04 AM (bbxLM)
2
I thought something was up as I couldn't bring up you or George Roper.
Posted by: Oyster at June 03, 2006 08:58 AM (YudAC)
3
No problem. This kind of attack goes with the territory, and as you can see we're all still alive. It's not like we need to start rioting and beheading people now.
Posted by: Jesusland Carlos at June 03, 2006 09:06 AM (8e/V4)
4
I'd bet the perpetrator was a registered Democrat no doubt.
There is a reason Jihadis vote Democrat...
Democrats have fetishized withdrawal.
Posted by: Darth Vag at June 03, 2006 10:19 AM (+nlyI)
5
I thought it was an all out jihadi attack because Rusty *cough* did not update his other blog to let the masses know why it was down *cough*
Posted by: davec at June 03, 2006 01:35 PM (CcXvt)
HGTV: Still Ruining My Life
If I'm not around as much lately, it's because of HGTV. It convinced my wife that I could remodel the bathroom. HGTV was wrong. Very wrong. Bad HGTV. Bad.
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LOL My mother is addicted to that station. I think the cure is to actually try and put your ideas into practice. Lots of work. You should have made HER do it.
3PO: Yes Master Vinnie we ran into some...
Yes the evil Darth Odie er uh Darth Howie needs to be educated in the moral complexities of simple matters. Like why fighting those who seek to dominate us through fear and terror is just wrong. Check out this loving tolerant piece of reader love mail.
