August 09, 2004

Don Henley Must Die

Mojo Nixon was right. Inspired by Gleeful Extremist and Dr. Chaos.

On second thought, the lyrics don't need any changes whatsoever. Read them in the extended entry. Also, instead of buying Don Henley's newest crap, why not go down to your local store and buy an old Mojo Nixon album? And if they don't have Mojo Nixon...well, then their store could use some fixin!!!! This is the sound of my brain
Then I said -This is the sound of my brain on Don Henley
Then I said -One two three four

He's a tortured artist
Used to be in the eagles
Now he whines like a wounded beagle

Poet of despair
Puffed up with hot air
He's serious, pretentious and I just don't care

Don henley must die
Don't let him get back together
With Glenn Frey, Don Henley must die

Cut on the TV
And what did I see
This bloated hairy thing winnin' a grammy
Huah

Best rock vocalist
Compared to what
Bunch of pseudo-serious Kraft angst-a-matic
Satanic plot

Don Henley Must die
Put a sharp stick in his eye, don henley must die
Ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya
Oh

Quit playin' that crap
Youíre out of the band

I'm only kidding, can't you tell?
I love his sensitve music
Idiot poetry swell

You and your kind
Are killin' rock and roll
It's not because youíre o-l-d
--Cause you ain't
Got no soul

Don't be afraid of fun
Loosen up your ponytail
Be wild, young
Free and-a
Get your head
Outta your tail

Don Henley
Must die
Donít let him get back together
With Glenn Frey

Don Henley
Must die
Put him in the electric chair
Watch him fry, Don Henley must die

Don Henley must die
Ah ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya ya

No Eagles reunion
The same goes for you too Sting
Ah
Oh

Posted by: Rusty at 02:18 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
Post contains 328 words, total size 2 kb.

1 I respectfully beg to differ. Perhaps the most anti-Liberal song I've ever heard is Get Over It on the Eagles' Hell Freezes Over reunion album. The lyrics submitted for your pleasure: I turn on the tube and what do I see A whole lotta people cryin' 'Don't blame me' They point their crooked little fingers at everybody else Spend all their time feelin' sorry for themselves Victim of this, victim of that Your momma's too thin; your daddy's too fat Get over it Get over it All this whinin' and cryin' and pitchin' a fit Get over it, get over it You say you haven't been the same since you had your little crash But you might feel better if I gave you some cash The more I think about it, Old Billy was right Let's kill all the lawyers, kill 'em tonight You don't want to work, you want to live like a king But the big, bad world doesn't owe you a thing Get over it Get over it If you don't want to play, then you might as well split Get over it, Get over it It's like going to confession every time I hear you speak You're makin' the most of your losin' streak Some call it sick, but I call it weak You drag it around like a ball and chain You wallow in the guilt; you wallow in the pain You wave it like a flag, you wear it like a crown Got your mind in the gutter, bringin' everybody down Complain about the present and blame it on the past I'd like to find your inner child and kick its little ass Perhaps he's maturing a little in his old age.

Posted by: Gordon at August 09, 2004 03:44 PM (7sq4M)

2 Sorry, I just followed the links. He no grow up. But I still reserve the right to like his music while detesting his politics. (See Springsteen)

Posted by: Gordon at August 09, 2004 03:47 PM (7sq4M)

3 Possibly anti-liberal....but I still hold that Don Henly sucks. As did the Eagles. Except for that one line "saw a Black Flagg sticker on a Cadillac..."

Posted by: RS at August 09, 2004 04:18 PM (JQjhA)

4 Don't the lyrics Gordon cites read like sarcasm? Like the Eagles were trying to say, look how evil conservatives think? Either way, they suck(ed). I guess it's better than California Dreaming, cause we all know what happens when they play that song.

Posted by: Professor Chaos at August 09, 2004 05:44 PM (YKvJh)

5 Again respectfully, the Henley version is "Dead Head sticker on a Cadillac" there is a new version (Mojo Nixons?) that updated it with "Black Flag" By the way, the last lyric, "I'd like to find your inner child and kick its little ass" works for me sarcasm or not ;-).

Posted by: Gordon at August 09, 2004 06:01 PM (7sq4M)

6 hi man you r ammazing i love your voice i love your songs $ i love you i want to see your stage concer befour i die

Posted by: johnson at January 24, 2005 08:24 AM (82djw)

7 The poor soul who wrote the song about Mr. Henley is obviously jealous of one of the world's best song writers. Don Henley is a genius!

Posted by: Richard Day at January 27, 2005 04:03 PM (ovOs1)

8 You people need to get a life!!!!!!!!!!! Don Henley and the Eagles Band are the BEST!!!!

Posted by: Gary at June 24, 2005 04:12 PM (jJI29)

9 I'd like to know what Don Henley would do if he saw that song(if you can call it that). But oh, can I imagine! I would LOVE to see what his reply to that song would be!

Posted by: Cheyenne at June 29, 2005 12:54 PM (50ci/)

10 Actually, in a Dallas bar, Don Henley joined Mojo on stage and sang it with him. I learned about it on a trivia tidbit from Sirius Radio.

Posted by: ER at July 12, 2005 07:14 AM (xbpsp)

11 ahh jes gotta say.. ahhz cumpleetly ahhgree wit wat da man sez. an ahh kno ya kno wat im sayin' right? like i don dribble 'til da winoze whine ya dig.. heh heh heh ya assclowns! ya datz wat i sez.. ASSCLOWNS!!

Posted by: spokeshave mclachlan at July 19, 2005 11:19 PM (5Mqby)

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