From Heinrich Isaac, who's IP tracks to Northop Grumman, one of America's leading defense contract companies, and who decided to e-mail every single one of us at The Jawa Report in response to an earlier post on a new Polygamy law in Malaysia which would allow husbands to take their wives property if divorced. Besides wasting government contract money surfing the web, Heinrich Isaac is also a moron unable to distinguish between a 'religion' and a 'race' and unable to distinguish between what my relative (who is from Malaysia) and I think.

Not content with writing us an insulting e-mail, he then threatens us not to respond. If you are a glutton for punishment, or maybe into S&M, you will find the letter below marginally interesting. more...

Posted by: Rusty at 01:20 PM | Comments (13) | Add Comment
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Warning: Possible eye burning and/or unresolved feelings of confusion below. more...

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Good on you Traderrob of Exposing the Left and The Jawa Report for making the NY Times. I guess you've finally made it.

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We have been in the process of hiring a new pilot for the Sandcrawler. The old one hits too many bumps and makes it hard to type. Sandcrawlers are actually quite complex so we are accepting applications from airline pilots.

Rusty, I reckon we should call this one back for a second interview. From his resume I think he may be just the guy were looking for.

You are now free to move about the Sandcrawler.

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Filthy has moved from thefiltyone.blogspot.com to www.thefilthyreport.blogspot.com.

Also Mr. Right has another great satire piece here. He is so funny!

The Right Place has managed to obtain a faculty only answer-keyed copy of a final examination that is regularly administered to the students in the prestigious journalism program at a major American university! The contents of this exam may shock and horrify you! Then again, they may go a long way towards explaining the sad state of journalism in this country these days.

And Rusty is back!!

Macktastic Rusty Wicked : Scroll through the site. I'll be posting three weeks worth of stuff today. Yes, I'm that good.

And yes he is that good.

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Scroll through the site. I'll be posting three weeks worth of stuff today. Yes, I'm that good.

Posted by: Rusty at 11:43 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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1 Welcome back Rusty...

Posted by: Dustyvet at January 08, 2006 05:57 PM (M7kiy)

2 Where the F- have you been? You don't call! You don't Write! What is a Filthy man to think(sob...sniff...dab dab.) Thank God for Howie. I LOVE YOU MAAAAN!

Posted by: Filthy Allah at January 08, 2006 09:29 PM (uxn8Q)

3 Where the F- have you been? You don't call! You don't Write! What is a Filthy man to think(sob...sniff...dab dab.) Thank God for Howie. I LOVE YOU MAAAAN!

Posted by: Filthy Allah at January 08, 2006 10:29 PM (Fd0fS)

4 Filthy will now post three weeks worth of comments as well. ;-)

Posted by: Oyster at January 09, 2006 06:25 AM (YudAC)

5 Rusty was gone?

Posted by: Improbulus Maximus at January 09, 2006 09:24 AM (0yYS2)

6 Filthy I agree he lets us worry and worry. Ya reckon he does his mom that way too?

Posted by: Howie at January 09, 2006 09:35 AM (D3+20)

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I have well over 500 unread e-mails. If it was important, please e-mail me again.

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Can Georgia bloggers party or what? Let me thank Zonker from Thunder and Roses for organizing the Atlanta blog-meet while I was in town. Good times were had by all.

Until the Jan. 5th meeting in Atlanta, I was under the impression that those Rocky Mountain bloggers were the biggest party animals in the blogosphere. Overblown accounts of drunken orgies by Jeff Goldstein and Steve Green left me with that ill-informed impression.

These guys are serious about meeting other bloggers and were the first bloggers to leave me with the impression that they had 'real' relationships with each other that go beyond the occasional post-pimpage or e-mail. The three bloggers from Georgia had all been to larger blog-meets. From their many stories of excess, I'd suggest going to any and all blog-meets put together by Georgia bloggers.

Denny from Grouchy Old Cripple was there. He was grouchy. He was old. He was a cripple. He was a blast. I've never met someone who actually seem to enjoy wine more. Except maybe for this one wine-o, and that was a long time ago. His account of the meet is here.

Key, from Key Issues, was as lovely as she was interesting. Key seems keen on knowing my real identity. Because she was such a sport, here is the post that reveals all. Super-sikret message to Key: about that blog idea of yours, let me know how I can help.

Zonker, from Thunder and Roses, put the whole thing together. It was quite shocking to learn that this tattooed mullet-head actually drove a Honda Civic rather than the 1987 Z-28 Camaro that I was expecting. Thanks for putting it all together Zonker and for the ride back to the hotel.

Besides myself, there were two other non-Georgia bloggers at Jawapalooza, Atlanta. Chris from Signifying Nothing was totally cool and has his account here. Bryan S. from Argue with Signposts was decent enough to hang out with me all day and then to post this picture of every one--including me! Oh, and Bryan, you left your tie in my car!

Next Jawapalooza events: Chicago, April 13th or 14th. London, sometime between May 14th - 20th. E-mail me for details.

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1 It was great to meet you, Rusty. You'll definitely have to make one of the full-blown Jawja blogfests. Bring a spare liver, though.

Posted by: zonker at January 08, 2006 11:48 PM (/y7q3)

2 I got to meet Jawa Man! And feed 'im a salad! Thanks for the kind words, hon. I look forward to the day that we'll be on a first name basis.

Posted by: Key at January 09, 2006 11:28 AM (ngdyO)

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I'm back. Miss me?

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OK so blogging is fun but Bass Fishin with my new fishin buddy Sam, now that's good living!

Hat Tip: Mark

Don't I wish that was my fishin buddy? Nope plenty of work to go around here. I have however saved up quite a few links for you guys.

Bill Kristol makes a lot of sense he upset the left this week with this.

The Weekly Standard: No reasonable American, no decent human being, wants to send up a white flag in the war on terror. But leading spokesmen for American liberalism-hostile beyond reason to the Bush administration, and ready to believe the worst about American public servants-seem to have concluded that the terror threat is mostly imaginary. It is the threat to civil liberties from George W. Bush that is the real danger.

Huh they must have been so upset because he was right. Here let me help you.

Washington Times:I think when you suggest that civil liberties are just as much at risk today as the country is from terrorism, you've gone too far if you leave that impression. I don't believe that's true," said Michael O'Hanlon, a national-security analyst at the Brookings Institution who advises Democrats on defense issues.

Hmm right again. Does the left ever listen to their own good advice?

I'll make the rest of these short and sweet but that does not mean you don't have to read them. Now hop to it.

Al-Qaeda in Gaza.

Damned if you do and damned if you don't so which is it. Are we being over protected of under.

Totten Tours Libya. Just read it.

8 lives left.

Good day Captain.

Oh yeah and yeserday I got a belated gift of twelve months of National Geographic. I've not had a subscription for years but it's still the same and the photos are fantastic as usual. I'll finish reading it and see what interesting tidbits of useful info I can get. Subjects this month include various episodes of genocide and Iraqi Kurdistan. Thanks to my Mom who knows I can't resist reading.

Right Wing Sparkle gives us a link to her take on the Kurd article which I read last night.

more...

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One of the problems with being a redneck in the middle of the country is when you go south you are still a damn yankee. You go north and you are a hayseed. Some notherner (I mean way north) sent me this as a birthday card.

Also Filthy seems to be in kind of a tussle with this guy whos email is ehsam_786@hotmail.com.

The Filthy One (er uh the reply to Mr. Allah) : santa got me ur great granny he dug her out of the grave so i cud rape da slag wat did he get u a dik so u can suk on it piss off nw dnt email me i hope ur family dies

OK so his English is a bit sucky but since he does not want Filthy to email him any more let's do help him out.

Here are your White Trash Wednesday bloggers bloggers

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Happy winter solstice!!!!!

Reward for Little Bear. Parents around the globe cringe in terror as toddlers run to the TV with this tape or DVD. Therefore he must be “taken Care of”. My son played this tape at least 10,000 times. Amazing how little ones can watch the same tape over and over. Now I’m permanently damaged. I keep hearing “Happy Winter Solstice” and “Papa bear loves winter” over and over. My conclusion, I would pay 100 bucks for little bear’s pelt or it would make a splendid Christmas Gift the pelt that is.

Hat tip: cube neighbor Brian.

Here are your White Trash Wednesday bloggers.

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It's the Christmas season, a time for joy, frivolity, and gift giving.

In that spirit, let's all enjoy a little gratuitous cleavage, shall we?

Q: "Hey Vinnie, why you posting so much all the sudden?"

A: "Good question, I just found this new toy called Performancing for Firefox 1.5, and I'm playing with it."

Q: "Another quick question if I may, why are you sitting in front of a computer Performancing while your wife plays with toys in the bedroom?"

A: ...

A: ...

A: "I highly recommend Performancing to my kin in the Sandcrawler. Wait for me, honey!"

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Rusty Shackleford will be heading to Birmingham, AL tomorrow evening to spend his birthday in a strange town without the family. If anybody wants to take pity on me and show me the town, just drop an e-mail and I'll try and write back from the hotel sometime in the early evening. (Which reminds me,it's Professor Chaos's birthday tomorrow too. Happy b-day man.)

After that it's time for my annual upstream migration to the pond that spawned me, Los Angeles, for the holidays. Again, e-mail if you want to hang and we can work schedules out.

I'll also be in Atlanta, GA on Jan 5th and 6th. Then Chicago in April. Then London in May......The Jawapalooza Tour: Coming to a city near you!

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First we have Walter McCommon Jr. who is common trash. When he gets to the state pen I hope he has a nice long career as someoneÂ’s beotch. Old Walt just could not let go of his latest love. He loved her so much in fact that he beat her for three days for wanting to go home.

WTVW:Attendants at Palmer`s Market say the woman was badly beaten, and extremely grateful to be free. She told them that she had been driven around for several days and beaten, and did not know where she was. Police say she is from Columbia, Mississippi, and had been dating McCommon. They say he became enraged when she told him she wanted to move home.

Next we have trashy trash collector John D. Maxey who helped make ends meet with taxpayer funds.

WTVW:Now the former Solid Waste District Manager has to repay more then $13,000 he took from his department. John D. Maxey pled guilty to one count of theft and told the court that he stole $13,580 while running the Solid Waste District

Move him to the sewage plant firing is too good for him. Make him play with poop all day. Uh, John poop pipe #7 is clogged again.

But the trashiest man this week is not white. In fact he is a powerful idiot. I would imagine it is embarrassing for the people of Iran to have such an asshole leading the country, making and ass of himself in restaurants and in front of other civilized nations with his daily blabber. He could at least trim his beard not and then or maybe bathe on Wednesday. What really drives it home is he does not learn. He just keeps repeating the same stupid stuff. If this guy is not the next Hitler wannabe you can kiss my smelly white ass. Hopes this guy can be bargained with are misplaced. See you have to be able to understand the bargain. This guy may require a slap up side the head very soon.

Here are your White Trash Wednesday bloggers

more...

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Finals start this week. As the ancient Zen proverb goes, "If you understand, things are just as they are; if you do not understand, things are just as they are." Blogging will be light.

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If Drew Barrymore poohs in the woods, and there is nobody around to smell it, does it still make her career irrelevant and her onscreen personnae annoying? John Hawkins has the answer to this and more in the 40 most obnoxious quotes of 2005. The closer you get to #1 the less the quotes seem obnoxious and the more they seem treasonous.

Posted by: Rusty at 08:28 AM | Comments (19) | Add Comment
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I just received the following letter from the President of Blogniscient explaining how The Jawa Report became the Top Conservative Blog for a day. Those interested in the methodology of ranking blogs might be interested in how Blogniscient differs from other ranking systems. more...

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OK links are piling up on me so my apologies for the slow response.

Check out Vonski today. He vows to do a weekly roundup of positive news from the GWOT every Friday. Here is last weeks installment in case you missed it. IÂ’ll link todayÂ’s post when he gets to it.

OK he got to it.

Yes more fun and games at(Begin fun and games section) The Right Place.

At a press conference in New York City late yesterday afternoon, ACLU Spokesperson Ebenezer G. Rinch announced that the organization was filing a petition with the FCC seeking the immediate forfeiture of the broadcasting license of any radio station in the country that plays even "a single note of any song that mentions or even alludes to Christ, Christmas or any other religious icon, including Santa Claus, who is, in reality, the representation of a Christian Saint - Saint Nicholas."

As a follow up to the destruction of Christmas the AFA sends me this.(begin not fun and games section... OK this is not the fun and games part but AFA noted my post the other day so I'll humor them one last time for my favorite aunt OK, OK)

In Dodgeville, Wisconsin, Ridgeway Elementary School's "winter program" has changed the name of "Silent Night" to "Cold in the Night." Sung to the tune of "Silent Night," the lyrics include: "Cold in the night, no one in sight, winter winds whirl and bite, how I wish I were happy and warm, safe with my family out of the storm." The "winter program" included decorating classrooms with Santa Claus, Kwanza symbols, Menorahs, and Labafana--a Christmas witch!

Hey I can support that although IÂ’m not really into the Ford boycott sorry. Besides I drive GM anyway.(end not fun and games section)

Speaking of witches hereÂ’s one.

IÂ’ve added Glen to My Yahoo and I hope Rusty donÂ’t mind.

Good Dog

Iran's new President is kinda nutty don't you think?

I've heard of Spy vs. Spy but Jew vs. Jew?.

Stop screwing around with my Pop Tarts!! They have gone too far this time!

Pretty much funny as hell.

A Filthy Friday link for Mr. Allah. Be careful I have post filthy images traumatic stress syndrome!!

A link for Mike Tate because I feel guilty.

Putting the HO HO HO back into Christmas

You must read this!!! One of the best things I've had the honor to call attention to.

Sing along with Cartman here if you don't have the lyrics email me and I'll help you out.

more...

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Last day in class today. Finals start next week. No time to read other blogs or much news today. If you want me to link one of your posts, please e-mail me and I'll add it to this one. Also, if you hear any words on hostages please e-mail me by clicking on contact link above.

The Washington Post says the U.S. military is probing a video that surfaced on the internet and purports to show indiscriminate weapons fire by private contractors directed at Iraqi civilians. MORE HERE. Of course, the context the MSM doesn't report on is that these vehicles have enormous signs on them warning other vehicles to stay back or they will be fired on. Still, the video does not look good and I applaud the military for looking into the matter.

Thank a soldier week starts on Dec. 19th. Get busy by going here and supporting our troops.

12 Days of Christmas presented by Cranky Neocon. Send this to your liberal buddies. Tons of great gift ideas for them.

UPDATE I: We've posted on this before, but it sooo cool. A guy, a blog, and his quest for a personal Navy. It's also a good cause. Phin has more here as does Confederate Yankee.

UPDATE II: Cop gets caught stealing evidence. Evidence just happens to be the victim's skull. Hilarity ensues.

UPDATE III: Pat Oliphant, asshat.

UPDATE IV: Krauthammer and Astute Blogger--both brilliant.

Posted by: Rusty at 08:52 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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