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May 30, 2006

Because It's A Star Wars Themed Blog, That's Why

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May 25, 2006

God, Country, Beastie Boys: My Loyalties in That Order

A twofer Beastie Boys lunch extravaganza!

Llamas with Sabatoge. Chaos with She's On It

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May 24, 2006

Secure the Blow!

My buddy Cookie tells this tale of when life on a submarine goes horribly wrong. Don't read it during the dinner hour.

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May 19, 2006

***BREAKING*** HOUSE REPUBLICANS VOTE TO FORCE LIBS TO WEAR IDENTITY PATCHES

***BREAKING: MUST CITE JAWA REPORT***

Fascist neocon House Rethuglikkkans passed a bill today that would force all Commie symp, leftist, BDS suffering Koskid moonbats to identify themselves with a yellow stripe down the back.

The bill has yet to go to the Senate, where, if approved, would be sent up for blessings by our wise and all-knowing Emperor ChimpyMcBusHitler. Assuming he can tear himself away from talking to God and exterminating all of the brown people for a few minutes.

This story has yet to be confirmed.

Posted by: Vinnie at 03:22 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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Open Thread Friday

Things could get quiet here today, so have yourselves a nice little flamewar in the comments.

Sure, you could debate something in a rational and civil manner, but what fun is that?

Update: Oh, and feel free to hand yourself a fatwa with open trackbacks on this post.

Posted by: Vinnie at 06:02 AM | Comments (23) | Add Comment
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1 Ok, I'll start... Funniest thread EVER?: http://dummiefunnies.blogspot.com/ Discuss.

Posted by: Son Of The Godfather at May 19, 2006 06:48 AM (maXzk)

2 That has to be the stupidest thing I have ever seen! What were we talking about again?

Posted by: Fersboo at May 19, 2006 06:54 AM (x0fj6)

3 Super Sekrit message to Vinnie: Damn Rain, will it never end?

Posted by: Howie at May 19, 2006 06:57 AM (D3+20)

4 Have I mentioned lately that Democrats are traitors? Just wanted to make sure.

Posted by: William Teach at May 19, 2006 06:59 AM (doAuV)

5 I know one Dem who's a total Murtha-f*cker.

Posted by: Son Of The Godfather at May 19, 2006 07:37 AM (maXzk)

6 its time to make iran a parking lot!!!!!

Posted by: josh at May 19, 2006 08:47 AM (MGRcs)

7 Bush is an idiot with no consciense and no shame!

Posted by: Last gasp Larry at May 19, 2006 09:18 AM (FCC6c)

8 Much like God, Bush hates the underprivileged and the poor, expecially poor and middle class Americans.

Posted by: Last gasp Larry at May 19, 2006 09:21 AM (FCC6c)

9 OK, here's what happens to people who tell Bush the truth about what is happening in Iraq: (from Harpers) The field reports, known as Â“Aardwolfs,Â” were angrily rejected by the White House. Their authorÂ—who I'm told was a highly regarded agency veteran named Gerry MeyerÂ—was soon pushed out of the CIA, in part because his reporting angered the See No Evil crowd within the Bush administration. ....In 2004 Meyer was replaced with a new CIA station chief in Baghdad, who that year filed six Aardwolfs, which, sources told me, were collectively as pessimistic about the situation in Iraq as the ones sent by his predecessor. The station chief finished his assignment in December 2004; he was not fired, but according to one source is now Â“a pariah within the system.Â” Three other former intelligence officials gave me virtually identical accounts, with one saying the exÂ–station chief was Â“treated like shitÂ” and Â“farmed out.Â” ....As has been the case with other people deemed to be insufficiently loyal, the White House went fishing for dirt on the two station chiefs, including information on their political affiliations. Â“I spent 30 years at the CIA,Â” said one former official, Â“and no one was ever interested in knowing whether I was a Republican or a Democrat. That changed with this administration. Now you have loyalty tests.Â”

Posted by: jd at May 19, 2006 09:38 AM (aqTJB)

10 In regard to yesterday's Taliban attacks in Afghanistan: I am not sure that we may take for granted the report of 40 killed. It seems that only 14 Taliban bodies were recovered which would be one more than the Afghan police reported as losing. http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/story.jsp?story=691678

Posted by: john ryan at May 19, 2006 09:52 AM (TcoRJ)

11 Bow down to your King!

Posted by: Last gasp Larry at May 19, 2006 09:52 AM (FCC6c)

12 Thanks for that info JD. A good worthwhile leader would be too busy to engage in such petty " witch-hunting " tactics.

Posted by: Last gasp Larry at May 19, 2006 10:03 AM (FCC6c)

13 Even scarier than the witchhunt and punishing those who just give the facts, is that this is the pattern that GOT us into Iraq. I'm halfway through Assassin's Gate, which I recommend to all. It is a very fair account by a previously pro-war guy about how we got here in Iraq. Won all kinds of awards, and justly so. Even after reading Rise of the Vulcans, which is also excellent, I still learned a huge amount about Wolfowitz, Feith, and how they did similar things to what is described above--didn't trust the intel professionals, despite numerous warnings. Ran their own intel shop to get the answers. Did what Haydn criticized in his testimony about Feith--deductive and not inductive intel.

Posted by: jd at May 19, 2006 10:10 AM (aqTJB)

14 JD... that sounds a lot like the stuff that Robert Baer was talking about after he quit the company. Clinton administration didn't listen either, didn't want to nip things in the bud as it were. Seems like those at the top either just don't care when they could change things before they get worses, or that they want to keep things in the shit, especially in that part of the world. Senior Bush had his chance, Clinton too, this admin.... when is somebody going to grow some balls, take the info they are getting from the guys in the field, take the gloves off and REALLY set things right???

Posted by: memphis761 at May 19, 2006 10:18 AM (D3+20)

15 "Much like God...." Larry,Larry, Your soul will live forever and there is nothing you can do about it.

Posted by: Brad at May 19, 2006 10:44 AM (BJYNn)

16 When there is lightning, Larry thinks God is taking his picture.

Posted by: Howie at May 19, 2006 11:49 AM (D3+20)

17 I donÂ’t see Larry and John becoming good friends. Things probably go south pretty quick at the cafÃƒÂ© when Larry orders a steak.

Posted by: Brad at May 19, 2006 11:56 AM (3OPZt)

18 A good competent leader would be too busy for such trivial pursuits as witch-hunting!

Posted by: Last gasp Larry at May 19, 2006 12:19 PM (FCC6c)

19 It's almost amusing the confidense the Left feel about the CIA, everyone else is calling for reform, and wanting people to be held accountable for leaks, as for Iraq and finding WMD, according to Clinton appointee George Tenent it was a "slam dunk" no? Will we ever find the answer? maybe -- if we search Sandy Berger's pants.

Posted by: davec at May 19, 2006 02:42 PM (CcXvt)

20 Last gasp larry, john ryan and jd. You talk like faggots. Been buggered by any of your muslim boyfriends lately?

Posted by: greyrooster at May 19, 2006 07:54 PM (AWtJU)

21 Like Bush, our great leader. I also hate the poor. Unless one is handicapped in some manner there is no excuse for being poor and living off of others. This is the greatest economy in the world. Wealth is everywhere for any able bodied person who sets his mind to it and has the fortitude to go work for it. Every wealthy immigrant knows this. Why can't you stupid liberals learn what thousands of immigrants know. They arrive in this country penniless and are soon wealthy beyond their dreams. THOSE THAT WORK AND PRODUCE SHOULD LIVE BETTER THAN THOSE THAT DON'T. Wealth in America is simply setting goals and doing what it takes to achieve those goals. The majority of comfortable people in this country started with nothing. Just a matter of steering ones self in the proper direction to achieve wealth. Example, if one chooses to be a police officer, then he understands he probably will not end up wealthy. There are exceptions (Bo Dietl) of New York, City who became wealthy after he retired. Or is that again an example of anyone can become wealthy in America if he chooses? Poor! Ones own choosing. Thats why I don't cry for them.

Posted by: greyrooster at May 19, 2006 10:05 PM (AWtJU)

22 Larry and his Moonbat Buddies are in NEVA, NEVA Land! Agents get caught divulging Secret Info and it's a witch Hunt! What a bunch of Losers, Dangerous also! They have NO concern for the security of this nation nor it's people!! Just hate Bush! Sheesh

Posted by: mike at May 19, 2006 11:04 PM (w3HDb)

23 Right ... and 6 years after homeland security, our Grand protector ( decider ) decided to throw a few thousand guardsmen at the border, and pushed for turning our ports over to Dubai. Didn't waste any time wire-tapping though! Don't make me laugh! LOL Whoops! there I go again! Ha Ha!

Posted by: Last gasp Larry at May 19, 2006 11:36 PM (FCC6c)

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May 17, 2006

Who Writes These Headlines?

House ethics panel to probe several lawmakers

Larry Flynt?

Posted by: Vinnie at 09:57 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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The Other Unasked Question About Illegal Immigration

Where the Hell did I put that English to Spanish dictionary anyway?

Posted by: Vinnie at 05:53 PM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
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Will You Still Need Me

or will You Bleed me? When I'm Sixty-Four.....And the answer is...

CNN:On Wednesday, (Paul) McCartney, who turns 64 next month, posted a message on his personal Web site saying that he was upset over suggestions that Mills McCartney had simply married him for his fortune

I'm not worried about the money thing, it's like a prophesy! more...

Posted by: Howie at 02:21 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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1 But don't all sweet young hotties dream of marrying dottering old men?

Posted by: Improbulus Maximus at May 17, 2006 04:57 PM (0yYS2)

2 Sir Paul said that he announced their breakup so Heather could 'have a leg-up' on the media on this story.

Posted by: Steve Sharon at May 17, 2006 08:41 PM (L8hzy)

3 Heather demanded the split because Paul started calling her by a nickname everytime she walked. He called her "Norwegian Wood." She considers this cruel and unusual punishment.

Posted by: Steve Sharon at May 17, 2006 08:43 PM (L8hzy)

4 Most people believe that if this becomes a divorce proceeding, Sir Paul should throw Heather onto a landmine.

Posted by: Steve Sharon at May 17, 2006 08:44 PM (L8hzy)

5 Yesterday, All my money seemed not far away, Now it looks as though half's gone today, Oh I believe in Yesterday. Suddenly, Im not half as rich as I used to be There's a divorce hanging over me, Oh I believe in Yesterday. Why she had to go, now I know, she will not stay, I said grow a new leg, now I long for yesterday... Yesterday, Had a wife who when she tried to stay, Wasnt cause she couldnt hop away, Oh I believe in Yesterday. Why, she, had to go I dont know, she wore the leg Now, she's, hopping mad,and more rich, than yesterday... Yesterday, I thought everything with her was fine, Now I wish she'd trip over a landmine, Oh I believe in Yesterday, Limp limp limp, limp, limp limp limp!

Posted by: Steve Sharon at May 17, 2006 08:53 PM (L8hzy)

6 Paul and I are the same age and I've wondered why my hair is freakin totally grey and his is not. Could it be he dyes it? John was always my favorite anyway.

Posted by: Badeye at May 18, 2006 05:12 AM (jThLx)

7 What goes around, comes around. He slammed the "older generation" in the song, now he has become his own icon.

Posted by: Chief RZ at May 18, 2006 11:57 AM (rFh3M)

8 True, Chief. Irony, like revenge, is best served cold.

Posted by: Improbulus Maximus at May 18, 2006 04:42 PM (0yYS2)

9 Paul and I are the same age and our hair is the same color. Paul will miss Heather's hooters for sure. Anyway, I would. Ah! getting old is a pain in the ass. If I had to do it over again, I wouldn't.

Posted by: greyrooster at May 19, 2006 09:10 PM (AWtJU)

10 Seriosly, in London, this was THE headline of the week.

Posted by: Rusty at May 23, 2006 10:24 AM (JQjhA)

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May 16, 2006

Tonight's Double Entendre Post

Hey, it's not just illegal immigration that has people upset over bush.

Related.

I personally have no problem with either of those bush-related links.

UPDATE: I apologize, my 1st grade teacher, Mrs. Queef, would have rapped my knuckles for not capitalizing "bush."

Posted by: Vinnie at 10:14 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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The Charge Nurse: My Struggle, Part One

As many of you know, I recently underwent total knee replacement surgery for my right knee, destroyed while working for the Transportation Security Administration. For various reasons, not the least of which is the haste with which it was formed, the TSA has the highest injury rate of any federal organization, outside of the armed forces. This is one of the factors responsible for the extraordinarily high attrition rate among TSA employees. At my home airport, only 19 of the original 150 screeners hired remain on the job after less than four years. But that's another post. This post is about my historic struggle with the medical establishment following the completion of the surgical procedure.

The first indication that my treatment would result in a war of wills came at the pre-surgery consultation with my surgeon. Not only was I informed that the procedure would require a three day hospital stay, but it was to be performed at St. Joseph's, that most militant of hysterical anti-tobacco hospitals. more...

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May 12, 2006

Now That's What I Call Active Activism

Heh, time for some funny:

Police said a paraplegic activist for Southern California's disabled managed to leap from her wheelchair and run.

Of course, this is an AP story, which is why, even after she got up from a wheelchair and ran, they insist on calling her a "paraplegic."

Posted by: Vinnie at 08:54 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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May 10, 2006

Spaghetti Eating in Burka: Lady and the Tramp Remix (video)

Jason is on a roll and sets this woman in a full burka eating spaghetti, which we brought to you earlier here, to the appropriate music. Did you think it was funny the first time? This takes the funny up a notch (WARNING: screen spewage alert, drink liquids at safe distance)

Posted by: Rusty at 03:16 PM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
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1 I like how the one lady tries to go over the top. At least the chick with her back turned had enough sense to go under the burka. You know it is probably quite convenient to have a napkin strapped right to your face. In fact if you get get these chicks a foam dome they'd be all set. It appears they may be on to something.

Posted by: TexAg03 at May 10, 2006 03:51 PM (3qF8P)

2 that's hilarious. I'd like to see them eating ice cream next.

Posted by: elmers brother at May 11, 2006 11:39 PM (U2MGT)

3 And here at last is all the evidence you will ever need to know why Islam will never dominate the world.

Posted by: Dave at May 12, 2006 09:37 AM (wZLWV)

4 Very funny! It looks like the guy reading the paper is checking them out, too.

Posted by: Little Mickey at May 12, 2006 10:57 AM (7vlGK)

5 It's actually tragic. These poor women! It's humiliating. Away with burkas.

Posted by: Nancy at May 12, 2006 11:32 AM (2gNJ2)

6 The holy Koran says, "Let women be modest, and cover their breasts." And this has devolved into covering all their parts or getting acid thrown on their faces. And who do you imagine decrees this? God? Or the men?

Posted by: Carol Wolf at May 12, 2006 12:22 PM (xnoT9)

7 The comments here are offensive and culturally ignorant. Too bad ladies in burkas can't sue your asses.

Posted by: Ashley at May 12, 2006 01:09 PM (61die)

8 Yes it is too bad they don't have any rights. What a fine point you just made.

Posted by: Howie at May 12, 2006 01:14 PM (D3+20)

9 HA! That is hilarious! Ladies in Berkas, get thee to Southern California and gets a tan!

Posted by: The CarpetMuncher at May 12, 2006 02:06 PM (MoBQw)

10 In traditional countries, they'd eat in an all-women setting with no face veils. Less entertaining, even more oppressive.

Posted by: jb at May 12, 2006 04:54 PM (9omtA)

11 This is one of the funniest videos I have seen...ever. Brilliant.

Posted by: bonethrob at May 12, 2006 08:43 PM (LyYk4)

12 You guys need to get out of your inner Burkas of Ignorance. You probably never seen anyone eating veiled in a Nikaab in public. Nor have people in the muslim world seen patrons walking, unconcerned, buck naked in a locker rooms.When novelty is hilarious,intellect gets disheveled . Getting around a Nikaab,there are a dozen ways. Hats off to them for their ingenuity, who desire to follow the rules as they redeem being the right for them.

Posted by: MZ at May 13, 2006 03:19 AM (BJYNn)

13 Wowww How nice this video, I just ate my spaghetti's dish and I try to took them with an scarf, really difficult my folks.

Posted by: Suetonius at May 15, 2006 07:16 AM (3oTon)

14 I didn't find this hilarious at all...just disturbing. It makes me wonder whether "the rules", obviously made by men, are only followed by women out of fear. Are these rules "right" for them because they know what their society would do to them if they went without one?

Posted by: LC at May 15, 2006 11:23 AM (TXIYL)

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Eating Spaghetti in a Burka

Video of a woman trying to eat spaghetti through her burka. Notice the dude reading the paper trying not to look. Try not to laugh. Hat tip: RG

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May 09, 2006

Carlos Mencia Bitch Slaps Terrorists (Video)

Carlos Mencia's brief pissing match with an Arab who thought 9/11 was a good thing. Mencia is no dhimmi. Just watch it, you'll be glad you did. Hat tip: Maximum Leader.

"Blackie, Darkie, Cracker: Wonder twin powers, activate!"

Posted by: Rusty at 09:18 AM | Comments (28) | Add Comment
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May 06, 2006

Real Life Cripple Fight

Do not laugh at this. I repeat: Do. Not. Laugh. At. This.

Man Without Legs Fights Deaf Guy:

Kent Hisey, 52, became frustrated by the difficulty of James Mills, who is deaf, in communicating directions....Hisey, who has two prosthetic legs, stopped his car at the Porter County Airport, got out and used his walker to go around to the passenger side, where he grabbed Mills to pull him from the car, police said.
Mills allegedly pushed Hisey to the ground, causing him to hit his head.

If you laughed, you are a bad person. A very very bad person.

Posted by: Rusty at 11:09 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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May 05, 2006

My Experience With United 93

Helpless.

That's the best I can describe how it felt watching this movie.

Helpless watching the passengers board, the door shut and the plane taking off with 4 terrorists bent on flying it into the Capitol.

Helpless watching the FAA, ATC's, and military trying to make sense out of what was going on.

Helpless watching the ground get closer and closer before the screen went black.

You want to yell "Don't get on that plane!" You want to yell "No, dammit, American Flight 11 is NOT still in the air!" You want to yell "They're not POSSIBLE hijackings, goddammit!"

But all you can do is sit there, helpless, knowing what the end is going to be.

This movie will weigh heavily on my mind when we get ready to board our flights for our upcoming vacation. While watching United 93 left me feeling helpless, I know that in the post 9/11 world, no American plane will be ever be hijacked in that fashion again and used as a guided missile.

We have the heroes and heroines of United Flight 93 to thank for that.

Update: My wife offers her thoughts on the movie.

Posted by: Vinnie at 10:28 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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May 04, 2006

At Last!

Now my son and I can spend some really important quality time doing a six episode Star Wars marathon. IÂ’ll never have to explain Episode V and VI again! And no kid, those are my toys at grandmaÂ’s not yours.

Timeout.com :Geeks the world over have reason to celebrate today Â– George Lucas has finally listened to their pleas and is releasing the original versions of the 'Star Wars' trilogy on DVD.
On September 11, two-disc sets of 'Star Wars: Episode IV A New Hope', 'Episode V The Empire Strikes Back' and 'Episode VI Return of the Jedi' will hit the streets, featuring the digitally restored and re-mastered versions of the movies.
And as bonus material, they will also include the Holy Grail for true 'Star Wars' fans - the original theatrical versions of the films.

Yes Mom, it is the same poster from my bedroom wall.

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