1 Agent Smith says he will be watching your erratic driving and will be one of the cops who pulls you over for endangering The Architect's valuable crops.

2 Crossin' the highway late last night He shoulda looked left and he shoulda looked right He didn't see the station wagon, car The jawa got squashed and there you are (chorus) You got yer Dead jawa in the middle of the road Dead jawa in the middle of the road Dead jawa in the middle of the road Stinkin' to high heaven Take a whiff on me that ain't no rose Roll up yer window and hold yer nose You don't have to look and you don't have to see 'Cause you can feel it in your ol' factory (chorus) Yeah, you got yer dead cat And you got yer dead dog On a moonlight night you got yer dead toad frog Got yer dead rabbit and yer dead raccoon The blood and the guts They're gonna make you swoon You got yer dead jawa, in the middle Dead jawa in the middle of the road Dead jawa in the middle of the road Stinkin' to high heaven C'mon stink ---- Instrumental Interlude ---- You got it It's dead, it's in the middle Dead jawa in the middle Dead jawa in the middle of the road Stinkin' to high heaven All over the road Technicolor man Oh, you got pollution It's dead, it's in the middle And it's stinkin' to high, high heaven

3 Who . . . moved . . . ladder?

4 Help me Rachel Corrie, you're my only hope.

5 Now THAT was a light show

6 Rusty's wife: "Rusty, I'm tired you expecting me to pick your dirty clothes up off the floor. What did your last slave die of?"

7 Memo #19 Attn: Imperial Ground Assault Unit Conduct ............................................................................................................................................. Operation of AT-ATs while drunk and simultaneously partying with Mos Isley hookers can be dangerous. Photographs like the one above are embarassing and the Empire's legal team has expressed its anger at possibly having to face yet another one of Rev. Jesse Jawa's "Racist Empire" lawsuits. Any more incidents like this and the Empire may have to undertake expensive PR exercises like "Jawa History Month" and construction of even more Imperial Cultural Diversity Education and Racial Harmony Centres. The more money gets wasted on projects like these, the less money there is for fighting rebels. Unit leaders will be held responsible for the conduct of their troopers. Imperial Ground Assault HQ .............................................................................................................................................. Memo #20 Attn: Imperial Ground Assault Unit Orders 1) After making comments at a recent telethon that "The Emperor doesn't care about Jawas", all units are advised to be on the lookout and arrest on sight, the droid entertainer known as Kanye CP3West. 2) Should any more accidents involving Jawas occur, units are advised to at least try to dispose of the body. Instructions can be found in the manual for the ultra secret, Operation Hoffa. Alternatively, the same instructions can be found in last month's edition of the New Mos Isley Times - front page, paragraph 3. Imperial Ground Assault HQ ................................................................................................................................................

8 Look, everbody! Rusty's really baked this time

9 Dont ever drink suarian brandy or romulan ale when driving a sandcrawler you will flatten MOS EILELIES space port

10 Oh my god. The quarterback was toast. Let this be a warning to anyone who puts a Jawa in as QB, especially with the Texans' o-line in front of you... That's what happens when you take the red stapler off my speeder... After a night partying at the DNC, Jawa realized that waking up next to Cindy Sheehan isn't such a good idea...

11 Get the bicycle pump, boys. He's done it again.

12 "Alright! Nuthin' to see here! Now move along!"

13 Grissom: "You know - fleas will abandon the host body once temperature falls to a cetain point - dependant of course on ambviant air and weather conditions - and factors like solar heating - reference absorption/reflection factors of clothing, surrounding soil types ..." Brass: "Its a dead Jawa - I don't give a fuck."

14 BUSH DID IT!

15 NOOOOO! IT WAS ... THE JEWS! (greg's not here so count that entry in his name)

16 Agent Smith - Jawa 1.2 has crashed - again - please reboot and restore.

17 Although only finding the one glove connected made some suspect Michael Jackson, Columbus police say they are looking for former Ohio State running back Maurice Clarett. Should you spot Mr. Clarett, do not try to arrest him. He may be dangerous, and, unclothed.

18 "Oon tee... SPLAT!"

19 Damn! I SO should have trademarked "Caption This."