April 24, 2006

Muslim Small Talk Banned in Bathrooms

According to Islamic rules, talking in the bathroom is prohibited. In response to an inquiry from a reader concerning the acceptability of simple greetings in the john, an expert provided the following.

From ArabNews.com:

The Islamic greeting, Salam alaikum, uses one of God's names, Salam, which means "peace," and offers it to whomever we are greeting. We should always show profound respect to God and His attributes. A bathroom is not a place where people should indulge in conversation or discuss any matter. It is a place where people answer the call of nature and leave, or they take off their clothes to have a shower. Islamic manners make it clear that the less said in a bathroom the better.

Hence, we must not mention God’s name or the name of the Prophet Muhammad or any prophet there. We are better advised to do whatever we need to do and leave.

Reflecting on personal experience from working at a large firm with many Muslim engineers, the no-talking-in-bathroom characteristic was noticed but attributed to a general standoffishness. Who knew?

Nevertheless, the specific punishment for talking in the bathroom isn't discussed in the article. I would guess that it includes the washing of the offender's mouth with soap and a few Islamic demerits. Naturally, all infidels should be forewarned not to expect a response when they say, "Hey, Abu. What have you been eating, man?"

From Interested-Participant.

Posted by: Mike Pechar at 07:08 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
Post contains 245 words, total size 2 kb.

1 Er... As a follower of "the code", I am also prohibited from talking in the bathroom. But that's just the male code. I'm not sure why we needed to get Allah involved in all this.

Posted by: Macktastick Rusty Wicked at April 24, 2006 07:23 PM (JQjhA)

2 So, my son walks into the room, sees what I wrote, and asks, "What about whistling? Can Muslims whistle in the bathroom?" Hell if I know. They might be banned from whistling.

Posted by: Mike at April 24, 2006 08:07 PM (Crzmo)

3 Apparently, they also have a proscription against flushing or cleaning up the stall when they're done. At least, the ones at my last Silicon Valley workplace did.

Posted by: Russ at April 24, 2006 09:47 PM (utsLN)

4 If Allah didn't want Muslims to talk in the Bathroom, why did he make it so people need to take a dump anyway? Logic. the real enemy of Islam.

Posted by: davec at April 24, 2006 11:48 PM (CcXvt)

5 Man these people have a lot of phobias.

Posted by: Oyster at April 25, 2006 04:51 AM (YudAC)

6 davec, I seem to remember that when Muslims get to Paradise they will no longer have to take the No. 2, but it will somehow perspirate through the skin. That would give body odor a whole new meaning!

Posted by: jesusland joe at April 25, 2006 06:36 AM (rUyw4)

7 LOL! If that's the case JJ, it'll be interesting to watch the person try to squeeze peanuts and seeds out of their pores.

Posted by: Graeme at April 25, 2006 07:50 AM (N5vCl)

8 "Man, these people have a lot of phobias." Oyster, you are so right, and they exist because these people, in their minds at least, have never left the Dark Ages. If we do not get the rest of the country and World to understand this very soon, I firmly believe we will enter the realm of a World War. Because these people are stupid and fanatical enough to use the nuclear bomb. And they either have it or soon will. Scary stuff.

Posted by: jesusland joe at April 25, 2006 09:28 AM (rUyw4)

9 Random imam - "You mean there's not a rule whether the ummah can talk in the bathroom? Well, we better do something about it! People could start making decisions themselves (the horror)!"

Posted by: MegaTroopX at April 25, 2006 11:14 AM (kMzO2)

10 no wonder george Michael never converted to islam

Posted by: rob at April 25, 2006 01:53 PM (QpkBe)

11 This is a fatwa we can all get behind. Sharia, shmaria...I have no interest in speaking to another dude while he's handling his business. Now, if they would only issue a fatwa against those who poo in the dark, so as not to cut the fan on, neglect to flush, and then walk out leaving the funk inside for the next victim. There, my friends, is your great satan.

Posted by: Kid from Brooklyn at April 25, 2006 06:53 PM (vwcGN)

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