June 06, 2006

Lion Attacks Would-be Daniel Hidden Imam

I knew Daniel. Daniel was a friend of mine. You, sir, are no Daniel.

Turns out the idiot was probably a Shia Muslim since he was an Azeri. Which means either a) he believes he's the "Hidden Imam" and thought the lion's den was the well where prayers are dropped into or b) he was attempting to develop the world's first lion powered suicide vest.

BelchSpeak thinks it was a bet. I guess he lost.

Seattle Times:

A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to death by a lion in a Kiev, Ukraine, zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure, a zoo official said Monday.

"The man shouted, 'God will save me, if he exists,' lowered himself by a rope into the enclosure, took his shoes off and went up to the lions," the official said. "A lioness went straight for him, knocked him down and severed his carotid artery."

Actually, this proves that there is a God and that he has a very keen sense of humor.

Posted by: Rusty at 03:05 PM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
Post contains 184 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Who's Daniel?

Posted by: Scott Vargas at June 06, 2006 03:23 PM (CnDtU)

2 Never mind. Sorry, I haven't read the bible much in his life.

Posted by: Scott Vargas at June 06, 2006 03:24 PM (CnDtU)

3 "...if he exists." LOL! That was his first mistake. You don't call into question God's existence just before you lower yourself into a lions pit, you friggin moron.

Posted by: Jesusland Carlos at June 06, 2006 03:24 PM (8e/V4)

4 Sounds like natural selection to me. Sure he wasn't talking about Darwin?

Posted by: Purple Avenger at June 06, 2006 03:31 PM (gf5iT)

5 Talk about a half-ass leap of faith! Never use a qualifier when asking God's assistance! " ... if he exists"????

Posted by: hondo at June 06, 2006 03:56 PM (el7nZ)

6 Serves him right. I hope the Lion did not get aids after the bite to his neck. Poor Lion.

Posted by: Leatherneck at June 06, 2006 04:12 PM (D2g/j)

7 Only Catholics can get away with the Lion in the zoo trick. You others, don't even try.

Posted by: B rad at June 06, 2006 04:21 PM (3OPZt)

8 I'm Catholic and I sure as hell wouldn't try it.

Posted by: Vinnie at June 06, 2006 04:41 PM (/qy9A)

9 I don't know, going for the lions was probably a mistake for a first timer.This dude probably should have started smaller. Maybe something like jumping the fence at the Chernobyl plant and dodging those large gard dogs to get his sonÂ’s FUTboll back. He was just too green for this run. Yep, Green and not Catholic.

Posted by: B rad at June 06, 2006 05:07 PM (3OPZt)

10 Think the filthy muslims will learn what he learned?

Posted by: greyrooster at June 06, 2006 05:27 PM (Y2/LN)

11 True, or he could have started by showing up at a U.S. Army Ranger convention shouting "Jesse MacBeth is the greatest man to ever live!!!" On second thought...

Posted by: Vinnie at June 06, 2006 05:27 PM (/qy9A)

12 He should have started with something smaller - like rabbits. God probably would have protected him from the rabbits - unless God has a Monty Python sense of humor.

Posted by: hondo at June 06, 2006 05:41 PM (el7nZ)

13 Never mind beheading videos. A video of this would be interesting viewing and a lesson to all who test the power of the almighty.

Posted by: Jester at June 06, 2006 07:30 PM (TuAMG)

14 I was going to say "At least he proved one of Darwin's theories" but someone essentially beat me to it.

Posted by: CanForce 101 at June 06, 2006 10:00 PM (BRXB/)

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