1 Dumb and Dumberer

2 First I want to say Allah Salaam-E Sandwich to all my fellow Muslims. For those of you who dont know me, my name is Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, and I am the leader of Iran and the rest of the world. I want to clear a few things up about the letter that I sent to President George Bush and his Jewish-Zionist puppeteers in the government. I told him that we have no intentions of blowing up anyone with our new nuclear program, as long as these people agree to be Muslims, and follow the exact form of Islam that I follow without any deviation. I am glad to clear that up. As you can now read yourself, I do not have anything against anyone, except Barry Bonds. The Iranian people hate steroid abusing Imperialists who should not use human growth hormone either but only pistachios. We hate Barry Bonds and Mark McGwire. Additionally, I now issue fatwas against the imperialist cheaters Rafael Palmiero and Jason Giambi as well as McGwire and Bonds. The 12th Imam has told me that Roger Clemens cheated. I issue fatwa against Roger Clemens. OK, I am done.

3 We would certainly wipe Israel off the map. It is soon. Please wait, the stupid jews ...